Trust

One of the main reasons a long distance relationship can work is trust. You must have complete and utter faith in the person you are in a relationship with. You have to trust that they love you. Trust that your love is enough. Trust that they’ll always be honest with you, care for you, and never lie to you. You need to know in your heart that they will never cheat on you. That they will always be faithful in mind, body, and soul. Without trust, it’ll never work. You’ll drive yourself crazy checking up on them, wondering, worrying, hoping that something doesn’t go wrong. But if you trust that person, there is no need for that. You fully believe that your relationship is just as important to them as it is to you, and that you have nothing to worry about. Trust is necessary. And trust is not something that you should have to learn to live without.

5 Ways to Say “I Miss You” in a Long-Distance Relationship

Dealing with a long-distance relationship? Wish you could do something that, despite the distance, lets your significant other feel like you’re right there beside them? Check out these 5 places to start.

1. Send flowers. It sounds old and cheesy, but it works. And you don’t have to be sending flowers to a girl to make it work, either. Practically everyone — including guys — loves receiving flowers, and most florists offer arrangements specifically for the masculine type. An unexpected bouquet can cheer up someone and make them feel loved and appreciated for days on end.

2. Send a care package. Who in college doesn’t love a care package? It can be baked goods, music, or special mementos that celebrate your relationship. But no matter what it is, a care package is guaranteed to let someone know how you feel about them.

3. Make and send a video. It can be sappy. It can be funny. It can be a video of you talking. It can be a video of things you guys have done together. It can even be a montage of photographs of the two of you over the course of your relationship. Regardless, it will be appreciated and cherished.

4. Make a good, quality phone call. Amidst all you both have to do, spending a solid hour (or more!) on the phone, without distraction, can do wonders for your relationship. Making the time to have a phone date of sorts just may be enough to feel like you’re not so far apart after all.

5. Plan a surprise visit. It doesn’t have to be for this weekend, and it may be months away. But knowing that a surprise visit is coming will warm your heart in the meantime — and mean everything to your boyfriend or girlfriend when you arrive. (If you do go last minute, however, make sure you know how to get the best deals for college students.)

Source: http://collegelife.about.com/

Top 5 Ways to Survive Your Long Distance Relationship

Nicholas Sparks Quote

"Nothing that’s worthwhile is ever easy. Remember that."
— Nicholas Sparks

80% of Long Distance Relationships Do Work Out

I’m Here. You’re There. Now What?

I love this chick! Here’s another one of her long distance articles:

Last week I told you why you shouldn’t fear a long-distance relationship. Now, it’s time to talk specifics. You’re in a long-distance relationship, but how do you make it work every day? Whether you’re doing long-distance across cities, states or even countries, the fundamentals of keeping long-distance love healthy are basically universal.

1.) Know your phone plan: I say this because when I was in London and my boyfriend, Chris, was in Syracuse, we thought we had a great calling plan. Because of this, we would talk on the phone almost every day. One morning I woke up to an e-mail from my mother with a subject line that read “!!!!!!!!!!” In the e-mail, I found out that we didn’t completely understand the details of our calling plan, and therefore had racked up a $3,000 phone bill. After much pleading and begging with Verizon we were able to knock it down to a reasonable fee, but needless to say our error was almost disastrous. This is why you should figure out your phone situation before you begin a long-distance thing.

2.) Plan your calls: This is especially important if you’re dealing with a time difference. You don’t want to be sitting on Skype sad and pissed off that the only person you can talk to is the robot you call to see if your sound is working. If you want to have a long catch-up, plan it out in advance so you’ll both be free and ready to chat.

3.) Share pictures of your city: Take pictures of the new views, restaurants, and attractions that you discover in your city, and share them with your guy. It’ll help you feel like you’re experiencing the things your city has to offer together. If you’re feeling really romantic, make a little sign that says “I love you” or “I miss you” and get a picture of you holding it in front of a cool landmark in your city. Send it to your guy to remind him that you’re thinking of him even if you aren’t together.

4.) Plan virtual dates: Just because you’re in different cities, doesn’t mean you can’t go on a date together. Rent the same DVD, get on Skype, press play and watch it “together.” Order/cook the same type of food, and eat it while you Skype. Pretend like you’re out at a restaurant and have a virtual date.

5.) Share the good and the bad: This mostly pertains to studying abroad, but could also apply to other types of long-distance too. If you’re in a new city experiencing amazing things and your significant other is stuck at home, make sure you share the good and the bad. If you’re constantly talking about what a fabulous time you’re having, how beautiful the city is, how nice the people are, etc. it can make your partner feel like you’ve built a new life without him. Don’t feel bad about talking about the great things that are happening, but be realistic about what your life in the new city is like. Tell him when you’re stressed about a paper or a work project. Include him in all aspects of your life, not just the exciting things.

5.) Don’t be afraid to fight: When I first went to London, I was afraid to disagree with Chris about the slightest thing. We were on separate continents and I was scared what would happen if I brought up an issue when we weren’t in the same room. What if Skype cut out? What if he interpreted what I said differently because he wasn’t there to read my body language? I was there for four months, so after a while I learned that you have to maintain a normal relationship even if you aren’t in the same city. If something was bothering me, I would bring it up just like I would if he was sitting next to me. It was a little strange at first, but I felt a lot better once I knew that no subject was off-limits. With that in mind, be careful not to pick fights because you miss each other and don’t enjoy doing long-distance. Being apart can be frustrating, but don’t take out that sadness and frustration on the other person. Are you really mad at the way he answered the phone when you called, or are you mad that you have to talk to him on the phone instead of seeing him? Keep it in perspective.

6.) “Check in” whenever possible: Balancing two busy schedules is not easy, and it’s more difficult when you can’t come home and see each other at the end of a long day. “Checking in” is a strategy I heard about while watching the show “Giuliana and Bill” featuring E!’s Giuliana Rancic. Don’t judge me. Anyway, G says that whenever she or Bill travel, they always “check in”. Basically this means that if you have five minutes, you call the other person to remind him/her that you love him/her. Even if he/she doesn’t answer, you leave a voicemail and then he/she knows you were thinking about him/her. If you talk, it doesn’t have to be a long conversation. The point is just to show that you care.  Sweet, right?

Have you tried any of these tips while doing long-distance? Any others I haven’t thought of yet? Let me know! Leave me a comment, or find me on Twitter @lifewithlauren1.

Source: http://thecollegecrush.com/im-here-youre-there-now-what/

The Benefits of a Long Distance Relationship

You guys I love this article! It talks about the positive aspects of a long distance relationship - the good things that come out of it. It’s a really neat way of looking at it. I thought it was great, so I decided to share it with all of you!

Enjoy!

We all know the not-so-fun parts of doing long distance. But I want to talk about a few of the benefits (yes, they exist) of doing distance. My boyfriend and I spent a good chunk of our relationship doing long distance, and I came to realize that there are actually a few perks that come with the whole thing. Hear me out:

1.) It’s like Orbitz. Only better: When your significant other is living in another city, it gives you an excuse to visit that city (and stay for free). Then you also have the inside scoop on that city’s best bars, restaurants, and attractions. It’s like dating your own personal tour guide, and you don’t even have to tip.

2.) You are your own hero: Now that I live with my boyfriend, it’s easy to pass the unpleasant household duties on to him. For instance, when we had a moth the size of a small child in our bedroom. I handed him a can of Raid and a fly swatter, and then was nowhere to be found. Had I still been living on my own, I would have womaned up, put on a big hoodie, grabbed that can of Raid and gone to work. When it’s you against the world, you have to handle the nasty creatures and the mold in the tub. I’m pretty sure that builds character. Or at least a strong stomach.

3.) More “you” time: It would probably be nice to be able to spend every lazy Sunday with him, but you can take advantage of the time you have apart instead of feeling sad about it. Have you always wanted to learn to play guitar? Take lessons. Wanted to try Bikram Yoga? Do it…. then let me know how it is. You’ll feel a lot better about yourself if you keep developing your own hobbies and interests instead of sitting on the couch watching Sex and the City reruns and feeling mopey. Not that any of us would do that, of course.

4.) “Can you hear me now?”: Doing a long distance relationship sometimes makes you feel like you’re earning a Masters in Communications. You’re Skyping, you’re talking on the phone, you’re texting, you’re emailing. You’re balancing two schedules, and there may be different time zones involved. It can be difficult, but it makes your relationship stronger because you’re forced to explain your wants and needs and listen to the other person. It also makes you better at communicating in general, which your friends and family members will probably appreciate.

5.) Lack of makeup is more acceptable: This one seems the most trivial, but may actually be one of the most underrated benefits. Do you ever have a day when you are just feeling tired, possibly crampy, and definitely not feeling like getting dressed up? Those are the days when you don’t want to put on makeup, you don’t want to brush your teeth, and you definitely don’t want to fix your hair. If you’re dating the right guy, he’ll still think you’re great even in that mess of a state. But no one really wants to show up at their significant other’s house looking like something the cat dragged in. These are the times when doing long distance is great. You can talk on the phone and he doesn’t have to have any idea that there may actually be something nesting in your hair.

Source: http://thecollegecrush.com/the-benefits-of-a-long-distance-relationship/

How to Make a Steamy Connection

Even if your man is out of reach, it’s still possible to have a hot night together. Achieving the ultimate in aural satisfaction is just a phone call away.

By Theresa O’Rourke

Pssst … wanna know a naughty little secret? Spicing up your sex life doesn’t have to involve elaborate new mattress moves. All you need to do is pick up the phone. “If you want to turn your man on like never before — whether you’re in a long-distance relationship or not — phone sex is the perfect opportunity,” says Gloria G. Brame, Ph.D., author of Come Hither. And according to a Cosmo survey, 85 percent of men want their women to make that carnal call. Why? It lets you test the limits of each other’s turn-ons “so you can dabble in acts that you may be too intimidated to try in person,” says Brame. Ready to master the art of aural sex? Read on to learn how to press all the right buttons.

Before you dial, dim the lights, sip some wine or curl up with a dirty novel, says Anne Hooper, author of Great Sex Games. Once your libidinous juices are flowing, craft the perfect erotic icebreaker. If it’s your first time attempting lust on the line, a simple phrase such as “I wish you were lying here with me” will get his mind wandering. Or inspire randy thoughts by reminiscing about a sizzling sack session you two have shared. Since you premeditated this sexy scenario, you may be more aroused than your guy. Bring him up to your level by making him feel like he’s there with you. “Tell him explicitly how you’re undressing,” says Brame. “Reveal that you’ve sprayed the coconut-scented perfume he loves all over your tummy. Paint a picture for him so you can truly enjoy the experience in sync.”

The most engaging ear candy is intensely personal. So ditch the phone-sex-operator scripted dialogue. Honing in on what makes your man unique keeps it real, as Colleen,* 25, discovered. “Jason has muscular thighs, so I whispered that I was imagining the weight of his strong legs pressing against me with each thrust. His groans let me know that he was turned on by what I was describing.” Next, encourage him to reveal what he’s dying to do to you. One way to coax out these dirty desires is by asking questions, such as “Do you want to kiss my breasts?” Posing queries is also a good tactic if you’re looking for a kinkier conversation. Selena, 27, led her boyfriend Jack down a lustier path by asking, “‘How would you feel if I tied you up?’ When he said he’d enjoy that, I described taking off my bra and using the straps to secure his arms.” Says Brame: “Things you may be too inhibited to ask face-to-face suddenly start to roll off your tongue.”

*Names have been changed.

When the torrid talk reaches a boiling point, take matters into your own hands … literally. “Having phone sex without mutual masturbation is like cooking a meal and not allowing yourself the pleasure of eating it,” says Brame. Think of the advantages: You’re indulging in a sex act with him, but you’re free to touch yourself exclusively. Encourage him to give you instructions about where and how your hands should wander. And ask how he’s stimulating his own bod. Not only will you hang up with a smile on your face, but you’ll also be better able to satisfy each other when you get frisky in the flesh.

Sending erotic messages from one cell phone to another is a racy rage overseas, and now it’s hitting our shores. In Europe, one in four mobile users admit to dabbling in typed foreplay. So if you want to turn him on — but you’re in public, where your lips should be sealed — page him your passionate thoughts.

Read more: Phone Sex - How to Have Phone Sex - Talking Dirty - Cosmopolitan 

Surviving A Long Distance Relationship

There are more people in long distance relationships than you’d think. I myself, am currently in one. I’ve been doing the whole long distance thing for about a year now. My boyfriend and I had only been dating about 3 months when he had to leave to go to a college two states away. But when you love someone, you know. And when someone is worth going through the tough times, you know. And I knew. I have a long distance blog on Tumblr, and the number of people in the LDR community astounded me. You don’t really think about it until you’re in one, but there are so many different ways to be in a LDR. Being with someone who is serving our country, meeting online, meeting on vacation, going away to school, etc. It’s crazy! But it’s so wonderful to see all the love and effort that goes into making all of these relationships work. So here are my top 10 ways to make sure your long distance relationship works and lasts.

1. Communicate.In a long distance relationship, communication is key. Don’t ever be afraid to say what you feel. Your boyfriend/girlfriend isn’t with you, so they can’t get a good sense of what’s going on in your mind and heart. You need to have a very open and honest relationship that allows both of you to speak and feel freely, and talk things out. This will help you to have a strong connection and build trust, which is incredibly important in a long distance relationship.
2. Figure out your schedules and make time for each other.Whether it be work, school, time zone differences, there is always something that can keep you from having time to Skype, or text, or call. And these things can sometimes be mistaken for lack of love and effort. So make sure that you and your loved one talk about both of your schedules, find times that work for both of you to sit down and Skype or talk on the phone. And texting is great too, because it allows you to multitask and keep in contact throughout the day. In my relationship, I make sure to know when Jim has classes, and he knows when I work, and we keep each other updated on changes in our schedules. That way, if one of us isn’t answering a text, the other knows it’s just because he/she is busy at that moment. Also, unless one of us has a really late engagement, we make sure to Skype every night and talk about our day. It’s a good way to wind down and get some quality time in each day.
3. Surprise them.Send them cards, little gifts, leave little love notes on their Facebook wall, whatever you can. There are all sorts of free online cards and apps for iPhones that allow you to send little notes and cards, and there are plenty of websites that have great personalized gifts and goodie baskets that can be sent straight to your loved one’s house – or you can even make your own! And sending flowers to a girl is always appreciated. Just putting in the extra effort, saving up some money to remind them that you love them can help keep a relationship alive. Sometimes people just need to be reminded that you care about them even though you may not be able to be there in person to show them.
4. Go on dates.Well, not necessarily go, but have dates. Virtual ones. It may seem silly at first, but having a date over Skype or through the phone is actually kind of fun! Make dinner together while Skyping, rent a movie and watch it at the same time while texting or talking on the phone, or pick a few TV shows that are put on Hulu shortly after they air on TV and vow to only watch them together online. That’s one of my favorite things to do with Jim. It’s so simple, but it’s almost like sitting on the couch, bumming around together watching TV. We both love it.
5. Plan for the future.It’s hard to keep waiting when you don’t even know when you’ll be together. Try your best to get some kind of time frame on when you can either visit one another, move in together, go to school near each other, etc. Having a date or time frame to look forward to will help you see the light at the end of the tunnel.
6. Play games together.Play a game online, or have a running game of Draw something or Words with Friends going. (Jim & I always do). It’s a fun, easy, and simple way to do something light-hearted together. When in a long distance relationship, it’s often the simple little things that you miss the most. This might help with that a little.
7. Flirt.Send a steamy text message in the middle of the day, share a fantasy, or compliment your loved one randomly. Because you can’t be physical, you have to find other ways to keep the fire going. Being flirty (or dirty) allows you both to have some fun, feel good and wanted, and gives you both something to look forward to when you do finally get to be together.
8. Don’t let snail mail die out.Love letters are a sweet, classic way of communicating and expressing love. Writing a love letter shows a person that you care enough to take the time to write something sweet. Write or find a love poem that reminds you of your significant other, or write a letter that sounds old-fashioned (like something from a Shakespeare play). Spray the letter with your perfume or cologne so that when he/she opens it, they’ll get a whiff of you. Trust me, they’ll love it. Plus, who doesn’t enjoy getting mail?!
9. Make Kodak moments.Share photos of yourself, of the places you go, or of a random activity that you do. Jim and I are always sending each other pictures through text messages of simple things that we do, or things that remind us of each other throughout the day. We also end the night with a goodnight text message and a photo of ourselves. Photographs are a great way to feel like you’re together during the day. You see what they see, and they see what you see. It’s almost like you’re right there. Plus, it’s just another way to communicate and let them know that they’re on your mind.
10. Make a list of all the things you want to do when you’re finally together. Include date ideas, movies you want to see/rent, places you want to go, etc. Writing these things down gives you a sense that someday they will happen, and it gives you something to look forward to. Don’t be afraid to get excited about these things either. Without hope, a long distance situation can get pretty difficult. Even talking about these things together can help build a connection, learn about one another, and spark new conversations.
    For more long distance advice & info, check out my LDR blog: Loving Long Distance

Via: The Inspired Diary